Dating is arguably one of the hardest things we can do in our society today. Between dating apps and ghosting and constantly shifting rules of dating etiquette, the idea of finding your perfect person is daunting. However, one of the reasons dating may be harder than it should be is our conscious or unconscious biases we have in our dating preferences, specifically in regards to race.
Studies show that there are certain biases towards specific racial groups when it comes to dating. In 2014, OkCupid co-founder Christian Rudder wrote a blog post that presented data showing there was a distinct bias against Asian/Asian-American men and African-American women. The same study, and multiple other studies, show that on the top of the dating pool are White men and White/Asian women, and on the bottom are Asian/Asian-American men and African-American women.
There is also a study that reveals that out of all the racial and ethnic groups portrayed in American media African-American women and Asian/Asian-American men are the least depicted. This should come as no coincidence that the two least sought-after groups of people on dating sites are also the least represented groups in the media.
As a society, we tend to like what we see, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise if the least represented groups are also the ones with the most difficulties on dating apps.
Several television shows such as “Grown-Ish ” and “Insatiable” brought up the topic concerning the dating lives of their characters.
In Season 1, Episode 10 of “Grown-ish” African-American twins Sky and Jazz played by singers/actresses Chloe and Halle, note how African-American girls are often the bottom of the dating pool on college campuses. The twins make a following observation that White women, such as the character Nomi, or Latina women, such as the character Ana, are more often sought after by men.
In Season 2, Episode 6 of “Insatiable” Henry Lee, played by Korean and Italian American actor Alex Landi, dedicated a small speech to the negative bias Asian and Asian-American men experience with dating.
“Asian-American guys get treated like the bottom of the barrel. We’re the least swiped on all the dating apps. It’s a thing.”
Sad, but true.
When it comes to dating preferences, there are many factors that come into play here; cultural familiarity, conscious/unconscious bias, Hollywood’s negative or non-existing portrayal of particular ethnic groups, and so on.
My recommendation is take a good, hard look at your dating history. Check to see if there are patterns that come up and maybe ask yourself why you dated the people that you have. This is not to say that everyone is prejudiced or to immediately date someone outside of your race or cultural group. When it comes to dating there are so many things that you have to check compatibility for, such as a sense of humor or similar ideals.
Why close yourself off to the potentially perfect mate because of outdated or sexually racist “preferences”?
Written by: Nicole Kirichanskaya
