Steph Wilson’s The Bell Curve: “You spend your life treading on egg shells.”
“Intense mental energy pays off when you structure what to look for.” -Bill Gates
By Suzanne Dooley
There’s no doubt that these times are tumultuous and fears are at an all-time high. Perhaps, you’re not sleeping; you’re worried about what’s to come. About what’s not to come.
One of the worst features about worrying, is it smashes to smithereens your ability to focus and concentrate. Your mind jumps from here to there to everywhere, and you lose all power of decision.
So, what can you do with your worry? In this very moment? Simply stated: turn your fear into momentum. Optimize your worry.
And yes, there are actual concrete steps -3 steps specifically- that you can take to optimize your worry, and make it work for you. When you perform these 3 steps, your worry diminishes, and eventually disappears. The first step will remove your worry 90%, the second step will remove the remaining 10% of your worry, and the third step will prevent your worry from returning. Once you’re free from the burden of worry, you will be able to think clearly again, and take actions to create a better tomorrow that serves you.
Steph Wilson’s The Bell Curve: “Medication is either your best friend or your worst enemy.”
1. Analyze Your Worry.
Start by writing down answers to only two questions.
First question: What am I worried about? Write out with specificity an answer to this question. Narrow down and describe your answer in precise detail. As Natalie Goldberg, author of Writing Down the Bones, says: “write what disturbs you, what you fear, what you have not been willing to speak about. Be willing to be split open.”
Second question: What can I do about my worry? Write out, at a minimum, three courses of action that you can undertake that have a probability of producing positive results. The more options you come up with, the more your worry will fade away. Look at the page and objectively analyze your options. Realize what option has the highest probability of a positive outcome for you, commit to that option and cross out all other options. If every option seems too difficult to undertake, then proceed by selecting only one option (the best of what you’ve written), and write about it for five minutes. If after five minutes, the decision begins to feel right, continue. If not, select your next best option and do the same.
Steph Wilson’s The Bell Curve: “I wanted to sweep myself under the rug.”
2. Imagine and Mentally Accept the Worst-Case Scenario.
After you have analyzed your worry, accept the worst-case scenario. Your worry will dissipate when you force yourself to face the worst and accept it mentally. By doing so, according to American author and lecturer, Dale Carnegie, you will automatically “eliminate all those vague imaginings, and put yourself in a position to concentrate effectively on your problem.”
Upon accepting that worst-case scenario, make a list of urgent and important tasks that you can undertake to reverse, or at least mitigate, your setback; then step away and do nothing for the rest of the day. The next day, after you’ve accepted your bitter reality of doing nothing, ask yourself: how can I improve upon yesterday? Any action that you undertake -particularly completing any one task on your list- will build momentum and transform your to-do list into a list of opportunities. You’ll effectively be paving your way today for a better future. You’ll then be able to live the words of the motivational speaker, Zig Ziglar: “Expect the best. Prepare for the worst. Capitalize on what comes.”
Steph Wilson’s The Bell Curve: “Claustrophobia is everywhere and anywhere.”
3. Sequester Yourself.
To prevent worry from coming back into your life, self-isolate a few times per day, preferably in a cozy space where you feel supported (which is more than doable during these pandemic-infused days). Be fussy with what you watch on TV; selectively choose the people with whom you interact; and fine-tune your thought process to concentrate upon positive possibilities.
In order to prevent the fears of yesterday and the worries of tomorrow from flooding into your mind, slam shut your mental iron doors from the outside world by doing these three things: (1) wake up every morning and repeat to yourself Dale Carnegie’s mantra: the best possible way for me to prepare for tomorrow is to concentrate with all my intelligence, all my enthusiasm, on doing today’s work superbly; (2) complete something on your task list and cross it off the list; and (3) adopt an “I did everything I could today” approach so that your daily routine automatically reshapes your future for the better.
At this point, it’s also worth its weight in gold to remind yourself that one month of consistent work and focus can create your dream life. Never underestimate the power of consistency and desire. You have what it takes to become the best version of you and to unleash your potential.
So, to sleep well this evening and keep your worry at bay, get your pen out and write, write and write some more; sequester yourself from all negativity and toxicity; and at the day’s end, look yourself in the mirror, and say: I did everything today that I could.
Steph Wilson’s The Bell Curve: “When anxious I imagine blowing up a big balloon. It helps to control and slow my breathing.”.”
-SD
The majority of ideas for this article are based upon the book, How To Stop Worrying and Start Living, by Dale Carnegie; see also YouTube video created by Productivity Game entitled: How To Stop Worrying and Start Living, by Dale Carnegie/Core Message, which provides a virtual summary of Carnegie’s book.
